Themostpreciousthinginthisworld,tome,istime.Thissenseofthescarcityoftimemighthavecomefrommyfather,whousedtocitetomeasentenceformanancientverse,“Don’ttrustthefashionableoutwear,buttosavetimewhenyouareyoung”.ThissenseofpreciousnesswasheightenedwhenIsufferedacomafromtheaccidentalbreathingfromthegasandtravelledhalfwaytotheunderworld.Ihadthechancetofeeltheprecariousnessoflife,thetemporarystayofamortalintheeternity.Asamagician,timeforcesmetoexperiencethemeaningsofthefourseasons,theastoundingtransformationsfrommorningstotheevenings,themappingofthesurfaceofthisplanet,thefatefulblossomandwitheringofflowers,thedecadenceoflifeafteritisinvadedbyworms.Lifeismagicalandenchantingindeed. 逃避者Escapee布面油画200X200cm2013
ExperiencingDeath
Ihadquiteafewchancesoffacingdeathandfoundoutthattheyweretestsfromtheheaven.Approachingitbutnotreallyhavingit,Ifeellikebeingledintoamiracleoramirage,aweightlessspace,withoutsadness,lightnessinthejoy…allthosebreathes,heartthrobs,shadowsarefrozenintoonemoment.InmyZenmoment,IsenseIcouldgointothatweightlessspace,ecstasy-like,thefountainofmyartisticcreativity.Togodeepintomyself,Ineedthestillnessinthespace,tosharpenmysenses,tocapturethosetwinklinginspirationsandwritethemonthecanvas.Themeaningofmylifecomesthisway.IthasbeenmorethanadecadenowsinceIhadexercisedmyspiritualselfincontemplationandpsychologicalexplorations,seekingthelimittomymindandbody,withanalysis,critiqueandtranscendence.Ihavethekongfutocometodeepdebateswithcomradesandfacecourageouslyuptomisunderstandings.Onlytimewilltellthatlifeandartcouldbemygreatestconsolationinthisworld.IamgratefultoknowthatImightbetheluckyfewtohavethechancetotastethesublimeemptinessontopofmystruggles.OfcourseIammodestenoughtoknowthatthetoughestthingisinfacttoknowmyselfinmylife.王妃的葬礼Princess’Funeral100×150cm2011
Wehavetofacetheconsumeristbehaviorsinexploitingthenatureandthehumanselfandthenumbrelianceonhumaninstincts.Wecouldnotretrievetoothersourcesexcepttoourbelongingstocreditcardsandtitlesandtwitters.Wedonothavetimetoevenquestionthedirectionsofourownpursuits,identities,andthepathsofourownevolution.Howcanwepossessproperly?Howtolivetocreatenewvaluesnotonlyformyselfbutalsoforalltheothers?Withthetransformationofourdailylifebynewmediaandtechnics,wehardlyhavetimetobesadorhappy.Weneedtogotothepathoforiginalthinkinginordertofindforourselvesthewaytothefuture.Butwedonothavethetimeorproperspeedtogointothatspiritualengagement.Forsubstitutingforthatenterprise,oneeasilygoesintodrinkingandgamblingtotestsdeathasachallenge.IhappenedtohavereadAHistoryofAddictioninthePast5,000Yearstobepreparedforthesechallenges，knowingfullythatitishighlydependentofmaterialsupportandemotionalblackmailing.Fromthenon,theonlythingIcouldformanaddictiontoisart.灵魂之爱SpiritualLove100×150cm2010
About15yearsago,Itriedthebungeejumpingtoexperiencetheweightlessnessandlightness.Butitalsooccurredtomethattotransgresslimitscouldalsodevelopintoagreed.Justasthedivingloversseektostrikeabalancewithinandself-identityinalimitedreality,artistsneedtoachievethisbalance.AsphilosopherSchopenhauerpointsout,wearependulumsswingingbetweenpainandboredom.Onlyyesterday,Ilearnedthatakidofmyfriendstrangledhimselfinfindingasenseofexistenceintheextremeexperimentabouthislivedexperience,justlikeIdidwiththebungeejumping.IknowIgotthecalmandstrengthafterlongstruggleswithmymindandspirit.Asfortheexercisingmyspirituality,Ihadtobelikeasurgeoninexaminingmythoughtsandspiritualstatealldayeveryday.Itneedstobecrueltoreflectoneself,forwetendtoescapefacingsuchself-examination.Confucius’swarninghasareasonforus:toreflectononeselfthreetimeseachdayisaminimummustforanyonewhoaimstobeadecentperson.AndalsoasLaotzupointsoutthattopursuitacausetoomuchfortoolongcouldgointomadnessanddestruction.Ifrobotsandintelligentmachineshaveachancetocontrolsocietybasedontheirownconsciousness,humanbeingscouldbeaseriousdanger.轻微自闭症MildAutism200×200cm2013
Humanbeingsarespiritualanimals.Givingupself-control,theirdestinycouldbeintatters.Searchingthroughthecosmos,re-evaluatingthe6,000historyofhumansurvival,Itastedasenseofdeath.Iamnotahappygoluckypessimist,ifnotanactiveoptimist.Yesterdayisgone,tomorrowisnowherenear,thesurethingistodaythatIcanpossesswithoutanyregret.Lifeisaprocess,withcontingencyasitsrealsubstance.TheendoftheEarthisnotmyconcern,butlifeandsoulscouldmanagetohavetheirownfuture.Lifeformemeansacceptanceofallandmakethebestuseofall,aslongasIcanuseartasanexitforthemaddeninggreedlockedinme.Ineverydaylife,thewellbeingofpeoplearoundmeisaninvaluableblessing,death,insuchethos,couldbetreatedasafriend.
BetweenLifeandDeath
Tang,ascientistspecializedinHighEnergyPhysicsinChineseAcademyofArt,hadahugeinfluenceonmesinceIwasateen.Theexperienceoffallingintoawellandcomingtoknowthattherewasnodarknessbutpinkness,taughtme,at5yearsold,toexploremoreontheterritoryofhumanimaginary.Experimentingwithwesternmusicandphilosophyenrichedmypursuitofartinthelateryearsgreatly.Artformeworksformmoreasawayofpresentinglifeasacosmicforcebyplasticizingtheexistingfigurativefaces,toextendintotheunknowndimensionsoflifeasaninfinitegrowingforce.Bystudyingpsychology,Iammorecourageoustoexploretheexperienceofdeathinaverypositiveway,thatis,totakeitasadrivingforce,爱欲之火ErosFire100×200cm2009
IusedtolearnfromseniordoctorsofChinesemedicineandgreatscholarsofI-Ching(Change)todialectizeonthecomingandgoing,lifeanddeathinthebalancingbookofadestinyandhadwitnessedthelifeforlifeswapscenariosrumoredamongthefolks.Thesupposedexchangeoflifechancesamongstrangerscalmedmedownagreatdeal.Lifeissupposedtobeaccidental,thecontingencyistheruleofthecosmos.Butstillmyfamilykeepthephotosofmygrandparentsasacult,asawayofrespectingthelostfamilymembers,especiallyinthefestivalsandholidays.Myfatherwasmarriedintothefamilyofmymaternalgrandparents,andplayedasasonoftheirownuntilthedeathofthelatter.MyparentstreatthememorialofthelostfamilymembersasaseriousritualandIusedtotakeitasadutytopaintmygrandparentsinmyworksasamourninginadvance.ItwascoldinHunanandwasadefinitelyatoughjobfortheelderlytositthereforhoursasmodelsforme.Theirnosesstartedtorunandtheirfeetbecamenumbandonlyafterbathingtheirfeetinhotwatercouldtheyrecover.Ineverregardmygrandparentsasgone.Ijustthinkthattheyarelivinginthecountrysideandcouldcometoseemewithfishandgrapesgrowninthefamilygardenverysoon.Ineedtorecordthewaytheygointosleep,thesweetnessandstillnessgoingalongwithit.Deathisatemporaryfarewell,lifeanddeathshouldbeinacycle.ThatistheoriginofmyLifeandDeathseries.LaterIgotofindmorepersonalitiesfortheseriestostagethedramaoftherewardofthesuddenandhorribledeathintheserenityafterdeath.Lifeisaprecariousthing,forthat,itisanexcellentmediumforarttopracticeacult.Thepotentialimpulsehiddeninlifeisasubjectforourmetaphysicalmeditationsonthewaywearetoday.“SuchistheDeathItselfisa15-yearprojectdepictingthegoingawayofthelovedones,theceasingoflifeofanew-born,thepassawayoftheoldmasters,ofthegeniusesinthepastages.Itisadialoguestranscendingtimeandspace.心上人Sweetheart100×150cm2009
Lifereturnstoitsorigin,soneedsthehumannature.Thecome-back,asdescribedbyVoltaire,isthereturningtobeinggoodlikeLouisXIVwasnearinghisdeath.Or,theimageofdeathlookslikewhatWincklemanndepictedaboutthestoneimageofthegodsfromancientGreece:noblesimplicityandsilentgrandeur.
TheNew-Born
ThebirthofmydaughterCherrywasalsoastunningdiscoverytome.Themagnificenttransformationonmybodyandtherelayoflifeinthewombmadeeachdayadayofenlightenment.Shecametothisworldpassingthroughmybody;thisencounterhastobetakenasapredestinedgracefromthedivine.Lifeisnolessthananadvent,theeloquentexcuseorforgivingandforre-creation.Fromtheearlyeducationinmypregnancytothetimelineofherbirth,Iregardedallthesetermsasanexchangebetweentwolives.IwrotetheManueltothePregnantforherMentalityandEmotionsatthattime.Itisliterallyatouroftwoadultsinenjoyingthenaturalsights,concerts,thelivelyandwarmhumanrelations.Wecametoagreementsonalotofthingsrelations.Somuchso,thatwecouldalreadydohandshakeswhenshewas9monthsold.Itwasnolessthanamiracleformetoseeherfootprintsinmybelly.打哈欠的樱桃YawningCherry100×150cm2014
Frombeingagirltobeingamother,thetransitionoftherolewasapassageinwhichanartistnewtheinnerlayersofherself.Isensedeverystepofayounglifeevolvingintoabigenforcementoflife.IrecordedherB-supersonicimagesasabasetopainttheintensificationofalifeatitsearlystage.Iplannedtotransplantedtheeventoflifegivingtothecanvasinordertopaybacktothisgiftfromthenature.Icouldsensethethrobsofliferightatthecoreoflife,andexperiencehardlyexplicabletomaleartists.Everymoveofthebabyinthewombledtoanimpulseonmetopaint,andinjectmyexpressionoflifeasanresponse.Tohaveexperiencedthemostcherishedpartoflifeonanotherpersonandfeelitsvulnerabilityandtemporalityatthesametime,alongwiththemixedfeelingofecstasyandsadnessatthesametime.Theparadoxicalfeelingwasalsoagreattesttomyartistichandlingofmyownsenseofeternityandmortality.Totrytoputtheselifeforcesonthecanvastestsmyownlifeforcetoitslimits.吸吮Suck60×80cm2013
WhenIwaspregnant,afriendofmineaskedherdaughtertotouchmytummyandsaidthatitisgoodnewsfromhumanity,agestureofrespecttolife.Manissmallcosmos,theheavenisthebigone,theharmonybetweenthetwohasbeentheidealofChinesephilosophers.ApreachfromaveryoldIndianreligiousteaching,asisthesmallest,soisthegreatest,hasbeenmymantra.ProfessorDeepakChoprafromDukeUniversitysaidthatifwehadtoadmitthateachsystemhasfeedbackcircuits,dynamicbalancesandlastingself-organizations,thenmodernscienceisreturningtotheoldwisdom:thebrainisacosmosandthecosmosisasuperbrain.ThreePoundUniverse,writtenbyJudithHopperandherhusbandDickTeresiregardedthecosmosasathree-poundbrain,ontheoneside,thepallium,ontheotherside,thedarkmatterinthecosmos,meaningthatthebrainisamicro-cosmos,andthecosmosisamacro-brain.Nowadays,ourreflectionoflifegoesbacktotheageofBuddha.Iusedoilpaintingandinkandwatertoexploretheinnerconnectionsbetweenthecosmosandthehumanlife,andquitelostinitscomlexity.Forthatexploration,Iignoredtolearntodrive,eventorememberthecodeofmybankaccountandhavenoideaofwhereismymobilephone,orbeingunavailableonthephoneandneglectemails.Myfamilyandespeciallymydaughterhastolearntocatertomynon-functionality.你干嘛呢whatareyoudoing33.5×33cm2014
Museums,Galleries,librariesandartfairsaremyfavorite.Iboughtsomanybooksandsomanycataloguesthatmanagersandcashierswouldcometohelpmehandlethestuff.Inthepast20years,IboughtchildrenbooksfromFrance,Germany,Japan,Russiaandothercounties.Theyarereadingmaterialsnotonlyforme,butalsoformydaughter.CherrylovesbooksandhasrealinterestinrecitingChineseancientpoemsandplaythemwithhergrandparent.Sheisnow19montholdandhasalreadyread300books,andisabletorecognizefiftykindsofanimals,andcanimitatethesoundsofafewdozenofanimals.Itisamagicthatwhenachildcanuseherorganstocommunicatewithherparents,amagneticenergyfieldisformed.Childrenaregiftsfromtheheavenandaretoolsofeducationforadults.Welearnfromthemasmuchtheyus.Howtoraisesuchsiblinggiftedwithcosmicwisdomcouldbearealchallengetomeasaparent,atleastasanequalchallengefromart.父亲的手Father'sHands200X200cm2013
Followingthenextpage
BuddhaasEternity
Taoiststendtosaythathumanbodyisacosmos.AndBuddhistslovetosaythattherearethousandsofworldswithinatinypieceofsand.Itriedtoopenmymindtoembracewesterngods,BuddhaandChristatthesametime.Inreadingthebiblesandallotherholyscripts,Iconvincedmyselfthatthesesayingsaretellingmethesameoldstory:tourgeustoloveinabigway,theteachingsandrulesareusedtoregulatethebehaviorsofthebelievers.Scientistsarestillhammeringontheexplanationoftheinnertruthoftheuniverse,nottherevealinginadvanceofthesecretofthecosmos,buttheblindnessresultedfromgreedandignorance.Inthe17thcentury,Leibnizarguedthatthesupernaturalthingswerepossibleandstartedtoconstructatheoryofthematerialworld.HisdiscoveryofcalculusledtotheHolographictheory200yearslater.AKoreanscientist,ZhenRen,writesinhisInfiniteCosmosinaParticle,thatmonadologyensurestheexistenceofacosmosthatiscomposedofnumerousmonads,ineachofwhichexistsaworld.普世之光UniversalLight100×100cm2010
Twoofmycousins,oneintheareaofhighenergyphysicsandtheotherinpathologicalstudiesenlightenedmewiththeirresearchesinmyunderstandingofthecutting-edgescientificexplorationsandthecomplexstructureofhumanbrain.Theencountershelpedmetoexpandmyexperimentsonnewdimensions.
Thefirstexperimentonbeliefstartedwithmymother.SheplannedtogotheBuddhisttempleontheHengShanMountainandaskedmetodoaportraitforher.Thepaintingdrovemedeepintotheinnerspaceofmymind.IdevelopedfromthattrialintoaseriesofcapturesoftheBuddhistaura.Itiseasytoseekmyselfinitszigzagway,buthardlypossibletoseektheessenceofBuddhainanimage.Buddhismisabelief,andBuddhaisthelightitself.WhatIcantrytodomybestismymeditationsinthesparetime.Myinvestmentinthispracticeledmetocommunicatewithafewcomradesonbeliefanddestiny.ButthereisBuddhaeveninourstubborndailystruggles.Theonlyrequirementfromusistorespectandsacrificefortheleastvisibleact.Inoursensitivedealingwiththematteroflifeanddeath,wearesuretomeetBuddhainhisface.Quietmeditations,quietcreationandquietlifenowmeanthesamethingtome. 人不妄动MovenoReckless200×200cm2010
BacktotheMoment
Findingmyownwaybacktothedailylifeistheonlywayofbeingout-of-the-worldly.Whatdoesthisgoingbackmeantoafemaleartist?Thebabyinstallationsareonlythemediumtoapproachthistopic.Theyconstituteakindofmulti-dimensionalityinmypainting.Theresponsesfrommygenderalsopromptedmetotrythisapproachonamaleperspective.虚幻的帷幕VisionalCurtain200×200cm2013
Inthebeginning,IchosemodelsfromartstudentsandthechildrenItaughtintheclassfortheobviousreasonthatIcouldhaveeasycommunicationwiththemandcapturetheirmetalstatesquickly.LaterIfocusedmoreonWangZetocreateaseriesofPetOldBoys.ThenIhadabiggerprojecttodepictcontemporarymenintheirfamilylife,philiaandlove,surroundedbyloneliness,hesitationsandnamelesspassions.OriginallyIuseddirectandclearblack-whitedistinctiontoimpactmyownfeelingswiththisregime.LaterIreliedmoreoncolorstoarticulatetheeffects,usingofcoursetheChineseinkandwatertoexploittheshadowandrealitydialectics.Inthisaspect,Myfather’sstyleofcalligraphyinfluencedmyhugely.
ThePetOldBoysseriesisasketchofthespiritualstateofsocietyinourepochasamourningofthelostyouthofageneration.Asafemalememberofthatgeneration,Itriedmybesttobefreeofmygenderprejudicesbychoosingtheviewofobservationverycarefully.Ihavegivenupthefemalegazeindoingtheseries,andtriedtoexchangeperspectiveswiththemalecounterpartregardingtechniques,expressions,frameworksinordertorepresentthemalesideofthestory.Itisquiteanachievementtoreadthelonelinessofaman,hismentalstatebehindthesmokeanddiscoursesaroundhim.IfollowedNietzscheinunderstandingthebraveryandfreedomonaman:“Thespiritiswayward,realizedinanact,eveninansavage,isanactoutofthewillofpower”.Themachineoftimecouldwearmeninacruelway,itisartthatcoulduseitsmetaphysicalgesturetokeepthetragicbeing-in-theworldofamaninsuchascale.对白TheDialogue100×150cm2014
SpecialThanksGoTo…
Myparentstaughtmehowtolovegenuinely,tounderstandthewayoflifenaturally,toliveameaningfullifecalmly,toappreciatemyownsingularitydivinely,toembraceart,writingcourageouslyandtocherishalltheseinagreatgratitudeandrespect.Theirphilosophyofhardworking,persistence,easygoingpracticeindailylife,clearethicalboundariesandintellectualpursuit,alongwithallthoseteachingsoftraditionalvirtues,havebeenthedrivingforcebehindme.ManyatimeIhavemadethehypothesisthatifIwasnotborninsuchafamily,itcouldbelikelivinginawar-timeage.Ihavewrittenaseriesofessaysinthenameof“MySpiritualFathers”tocommemoratethedayswhenIcouldbenourishedinsuchenvironment,asanexampleforotherparents.Inthepastdecade,especiallyinthepastfiveyears,Ialsowrotealotonmyteachingpracticesintheartworld,inordertorelaytheloveIreceivedfrommyparentsandmentorstomystudentsandtheirparents.
Iamsogratefulthatmyhusbandhasbeensupportingmethroughtheseyearsinadditiontohissacrificeoftimemodelingformeforsomanykeyworks,themaintenanceworkhetookforashischord,andtheargumentsandfeelingswehaveexchangedaboutmyworks.Weoftendiscussart,life,andthemaledestinynightafternight.Withouthimasmymuse,myworkscouldnotbesoresoundingandpertinent.WewatchedworksofandmoviesaboutModiglianitogether,timeandagain.Andinpickingmeupfromthestudio,hewasreadingthewritingsofDaVinciorofotherartists.Hewasalwaysalongme,evenwhenIwenttoexhibitinVeniceBiennaleandotherEuropeancities.Asaprodigyintheschoolsdays,hehadhiscareerineconomyandinvestmentinfilmmaking,musicrecordingandalsohadhisownlabelofmusic.Hehastheenthusiasmtosharewithallthosewhomhemet.Asaspouse,heisthespiritualleaderandalsothemostdevotedcollectorofmyworks.Asanartistinmymind,heisgifttomefromtheheaven.
NowordcouldbeenoughtoexpressmygratitudetomydaughterCherryfortheinspirations,thelight,theloveandtheintimacyshebroughtintomyworld.Afteradayofhardwork,Icouldenjoythephysicalandspiritualconsolationshecouldsocleverlyprovidedtome.Herkissingandembracingisinvincible.Andherunderstandingformyhavingtoliveinstudiomovedmegreatly. 
ManythanksforalltheendorsementIhavegotfrommymentorsandgreatuntiesinmydarkandself-doubtyears.IreallyappreciateallthephysicalpresenceofyouinmyodysseyfromHunantoBeijing!
OnearlymorningofMarch22,2015
Writtenby:FangYa-ping